limerence.net

These are really great steps Phoenix. I think it is wonderful that you took the time to write them down.

Sending you love and strength!

I have been thinking a lot about this turn of events. I always liked NDD's posts and perspective. I thought his advice of simply - not daydreaming about LO - to be overly simplistic and a little like Nancy Reagan's Just Say No campaign. The whole reason most of us are on here is because we are torme...

I’m so sorry Idi. Losing a loved one is always hard.

Dear Mezzer: I was very much in your space two years ago. My two cents? Tell your wife exactly these things. If you cannot tell her easily, then go to marriage counseling so that you can tell her there. Make sure you have this discussion fully and give her time to process this and understand her rea...

Cookie:

Just sending you love and good thoughts. You always have such good things to say on this forum.

Lately I've been thinking that I've intellectually understood limerence for a long time, but my emotional self still hasn't fully caught up.

.. it feel as if im chucking away a third of my life. I just had a long conversation with an old friend. We were "limerent" for the same LO, me for 15 years, her for 10, overlapping for about 5. And we talked about this exactly, feeling such a deep sense of loss when we stopped working wi...

Maddie: I have written about NOT an LO, which was my first sexual experience after separating from my ex. That very short six week relationship was indeed a conflagration. And when I look back, I see that level of sex would have been unsustainable and was coming from a great deal of pain on both of ...

Why is everyone telling us to put up with SOs and make it work with them when the truth is our limerence is a huge sign that our marriage/relationship isn't working in the first place. I agree. It likely is a sign that your relationship is not working in the first place. But it is also very likely ...

Maddie: I'm sorry this feels like a relapse, but its nice to have positive interaction with anyone. I am struck by you saying that you need to have no expectations. I agree in a general way. We should probably have no expectations of any person and let them be fully who they are and appreciate what ...

As I have taken a deep dive into healing, I am constructing my own theory for understanding limerence/narcissism/echoism/toxic relationships. I am an academic, and though psychology is not my area of expertise, I have done a lot of research and reading over the past several years to understand where...