My wife is destroyed by the fact that I had an EA and was in limerence. She appreciates me sharing and working on root cause issues, but is so broken by it and scared that it will happen again.
Can people share advice and articles on how she can better understand it from the significant other perspective?
How common is limerence?
I am very cynical about stats from articles on topics that people keep extremely private.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog ... heartbreak
Is 5% from this article accurate?
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How common is Limerence?
Re: How common is Limerence?
It’s impossible to know the true incidence of limerence .
I think one of the greatest barriers to getting accurate statistics is that few people are willing to disclose their limerence due to shame. I have made a YouTube video on this topic.
In our couples practice with affair recovery it often takes a long time for someone who is having an affair to acknowledge the component of limerence which is so often present and accept that this is a significant part of what they are caught up in.
I have been very outspoken about my own limerence and have discussed it with many people. On a few occasions the other person acknowledges having had a similar episode, however it is not that often this occurs so perhaps 5% is accurate?
As to your SO finding a good resource, there is nothing out there that I know of that could be a value. There is a section here on the forum for partners of those with limerence however it does not get much traffic. If your significant other was willing she could also always do an online zoom session with my wife who is a trained therapist who had to endure my own limerence.
Hope this helps David
I think one of the greatest barriers to getting accurate statistics is that few people are willing to disclose their limerence due to shame. I have made a YouTube video on this topic.
In our couples practice with affair recovery it often takes a long time for someone who is having an affair to acknowledge the component of limerence which is so often present and accept that this is a significant part of what they are caught up in.
I have been very outspoken about my own limerence and have discussed it with many people. On a few occasions the other person acknowledges having had a similar episode, however it is not that often this occurs so perhaps 5% is accurate?
As to your SO finding a good resource, there is nothing out there that I know of that could be a value. There is a section here on the forum for partners of those with limerence however it does not get much traffic. If your significant other was willing she could also always do an online zoom session with my wife who is a trained therapist who had to endure my own limerence.
Hope this helps David
Purchase the 24 part video series on overcoming limerence - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
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