hiatus

[itry]

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[IvB]

Good to hear this, itry! Of course not happy that he hurt you but it may indeed be the breaking point. Yes, you will probably relapse but now you are on the right path. Indeed, he can never be your friend if he is capable of knowingly hurting you. Good luck!

[John]

itry, I think you are experiencing one of the ways to end a LE. He is refusing the intimate relationship that you crave and that he loathes. His interest is to keep you hanging on enough to feed his ego while keeping you on the back burner. Congratulations, eeing the light will hopefully lead you to recovery.

[Cookie]

itry, I think you are experiencing one of the ways to end a LE. He is refusing the intimate relationship that you crave and that he loathes. His interest is to keep you hanging on enough to feed his ego while keeping you on the back burner. Congratulations, seeing the light will hopefully lead you to recovery.

This pretty much says it all.

Only thing I’d add is that not only is he refusing true intimacy, he is incapable of it. I’ve never seen a single narcissist rehabilitate, including my mother at age 85. Her destructive behaviors are less, her attempts at connection are more thoughtful, but true bonding? It isn’t possible for her. We are all interchangeable to her, and it’s all good as long as someone fills the seat at the table.

I started thinking of it as a disability, and that helped a lot. I’m sorry for your pain though! The roller coaster of cognitive dissonance can make you physically ill. Stay well and stay strong.

[JupiterTaco]

Sending positive vibes, itry. Sometimes we need a break. I do recommend some type of ongoing forum for you somewhere. Maybe check out Reddit Narcissistic Abuse for a reality check if you feel yourself slipping at all. Good luck to you.

itry, I think you are experiencing one of the ways to end a LE. He is refusing the intimate relationship that you crave and that he loathes. His interest is to keep you hanging on enough to feed his ego while keeping you on the back burner. Congratulations, seeing the light will hopefully lead you to recovery.

This pretty much says it all.

Only thing I’d add is that not only is he refusing true intimacy, he is incapable of it. I’ve never seen a single narcissist rehabilitate, including my mother at age 85. Her destructive behaviors are less, her attempts at connection are more thoughtful, but true bonding? It isn’t possible for her. We are all interchangeable to her, and it’s all good as long as someone fills the seat at the table.

I started thinking of it as a disability, and that helped a lot. I’m sorry for your pain though! The roller coaster of cognitive dissonance can make you physically ill. Stay well and stay strong.

God, you'd think my mother had gotten better at fooling people but she hasn't (or just doesn't care enough to use it yet?) Her harassment, stalking, and overall refusal to accept any responsibility for the state of her life and relationships has gotten more stunningly brazen with age, but she's in her fifties.

I think she spent so many years relying on her looks to fool people that when it stopped working, instead of adapting, she reacted with rage and punishment against the world because of her anger about that, but who knows..

[Cookie]

Her harassment, stalking, and overall refusal to accept any responsibility for the state of her life and relationships has gotten more stunningly brazen with age, but she's in her fifties.

I think she spent so many years relying on her looks to fool people that when it stopped working, instead of adapting, she reacted with rage and punishment against the world because of her anger about that, but who knows..

Mine only got “ better” after being put on heavy-duty antidepressants after my dad died. Oh, the lies, triangulation, and addiction continue.

Sorry, JT. I know how exhausting it is.

[Maddie]

I hear what you're saying, I try. The forum has been a huge blessing to me too. However, I also find myself just being plain disgusted with the topic of limerence these days...which I'll count as progress. Take good care. You've made some HUGE steps. Keep pushing forward!

[itry]

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