Random Thoughts Thread

[Idiotic]

Is it even possible to love someone without hating them? I just realized all the people that i love deeply , i also hate . Is that my shadow? The 'hater'/(potential murderer) ?

[abc]

-

[abc]

-

[Idiotic]

@FG
I find the whole premise quite vague. At first they are like attractiveness is a bunch of stuff, and beauty is a part of it, if not the only thing. But later on they state when i find myself unable to attract an 'attractive' mate , i will compensate by focusing on other stuff like kindness and bla bla (i can't recall what exactly). So does that mean those other qualities that i look for as 'compensation' did not occur in my original criteria for who i find attractive? So does that mean everyone agrees on some objective idea of attractiveness as basically physical? Or are they talking about social class?

Plus i don't know i don't like 'rating' human beings be it based on certain objectively defined standards like that site they mention.

[Idiotic]

Is it even possible to love someone without hating them? I just realized all the people that i love deeply , i also hate . Is that my shadow? The 'hater'/(potential murderer) ?

I think this kind of question deserves its own thread...

I don't know the answer : first you have to be sure what love is (baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more... )

I can tell you I hate my LO, for sure.
Not all the time, but quite often.
I never really hated my previous SO nor my current one.

Most of my hate for LO is related to jealousy, I guess (the fact that he doesn't belong to me, that he rejects me...)
My previous SO never made me jealous in 15 years of relationship, and I really have to thank him for that : it's so easy to make someone jealous.
The current one didn't either.

I'm not sure what to say about your shadow question :
I've read a few things about the "shadow" concept, and I really don't know.
My LO is supposed to be my twin (in my fantasies), so his bad sides are probably in my own shadow as well, but I'm not sure that's why I hate him.
It looks like I hate him more when I realize he's not really like me, that we're definitely not twins and we're totally unrelated...

But it's just my own case.

If you're talking about hating your father or another member of your family, I suppose it finally looks a lot like self-hate and self-loathing...
I used to hate my father, and even if it's been almost twenty years he's dead now, maybe I still hate him.
But I can totally see I'm a lot like him.
If you were raised by someone, I suppose it's hard to avoid the fact that you're a bit like him.

Im not only talking about my family members, but an ex also, and another very close friend. I don't know what love is, but i think i know the feeling, and i recognize it. Maybe that feeling has a different name for others. Anyway, im not talking about hate for a reason, but hating who they are, their being. But i don't really trust myself, for example i am in a good mood now and i can say hey i don't hate them, i have only love, but ask me some other time and i hate the core of their being.
I don't much about jealousy, i dont really get jealous , but i still struggle with envy from time to time.
Why don't you hate your SO?(not that you should)
I mean not even a little bit? Do you love him? Sorry its none of my business, im just asking.

[abc]

-

[Idiotic]

I don't know if I love him : when I was talking about what love is, it's because I'm not sure I ever loved someone.
I have narcissistic tendencies, and people with those tendencies often don't have a clue how to love someone else.

I think i have narcissistic tendencies too, but in my mind i know something about love

(I hope it's all right for him too... I hope he's not going to ask me to tell him "I love you" or things I'm not even sure of. )

i know what you mean .... Yeah you barely know anyone enough in 9 months .

BTW envy sucks right, sometimes its for the most ridiculous things.

[Idiotic]

Feel as if im floating around on the dark side of the moon... Only, i saw a very old person cry. It shatters my heart to see someone so old cry. I wonder at the unbearable burden of regret or hopelessness, at that age. It gives me a shudder.

[Idiotic]

I just had to share this short documentary cos the woman in it is amazing , and so is the story
https://aeon.co/videos/on-the-train-to- ... 2-69549065

[Acrobatica]

In response to Sunday Driver.

I recently cannot be bothered with red lights. If a light is red for too long, and there is absolutely no other traffic (I spend a lot of time driving late at night), I will just go through it. I don't know if this is related to a general feeling of F it, I am sick of caring about useless rules and senseless social conventions that LO has inspired in me. I actually think that this inspiration was a partially good thing to come out of LE, if I can moderate it a bit, and not get a ticket.