a sobering talk on love addiction and limerence

A place for those new to this site. The more experienced users of this site tend to frequent the members only section more.
Post Reply
David
Site Admin
Posts: 3634
Joined: Wed Feb 19, 2014 8:22 pm
Location: London UK
Gender:
Age: 62
Great Britain

a sobering talk on love addiction and limerence

Post by David »

Sam Vaknin is one of the top experts on narcissism IMJ

His talk is not one of the most upbeat when it comes to treating limerence and love addiction

Still worth a view

Purchase the 20 part video series on overcoming limerence for just $49 - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
AMA210
Posts: 2385
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2016 2:17 pm
Location: Midwest
Gender:
United States of America

Re: a sobering talk on love addiction and limerence

Post by AMA210 »

Thanks for posting this, David.
I had thought about doing the same, but then forgot.
I've been watching several of his videos recently and it's been very interesting and insightful to learn the psychology behind the behaviors, on all sides (LO, LS, SO, etc)
:)
Never give up! Keep moving forward, no matter what.
DreamingBlue
Posts: 224
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2020 11:33 pm
United States of America

Re: a sobering talk on love addiction and limerence

Post by DreamingBlue »

I'm wondering if I was a closet love addict all these years. It's so strange. Meeting my sweet girlfriend turned wife "cured" my limerence/love addiction for 15 years. As the honeymoon finally ended, as daddy's role at home became less crucial, it was activated again through LO#1 at work, which faded thanks to daily interaction (she became human) and then through LO #2, the hardest crush in the history of my life.

I've managed not to ruin my marriage/life so far. I am going to try to not fall for another LO.

DB
Keater
Posts: 49
Joined: Sun Nov 22, 2015 3:02 pm
United States of America

Re: a sobering talk on love addiction and limerence

Post by Keater »

Good video. I am going to read the book he mentioned by Susan Peabody.
I’d like to understand more of the “why” I am this way, but mostly for what I can do to stop this cycle.
Have you no idea that you're in deep?
I dreamt about you nearly every night this week
How many secrets can you keep?
'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat
Alice
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue May 18, 2021 9:46 am
Great Britain

Re: a sobering talk on love addiction and limerence

Post by Alice »

Great video.

It’s interesting he mentions dissonance. For me it’s almost like the more I crave my LO the more I experience dissonance from my values and my life…. This in turn lowers my self esteem and leads me to seek reciprocation from LO in order to feel better.
Which then causes dissonance…. A kind of dissonance - self esteem - reciprocation loop.

Surely if someone with my values and my happy home life feels this way about someone it must be love right? Right? ;)
DreamingBlue
Posts: 224
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2020 11:33 pm
United States of America

Re: a sobering talk on love addiction and limerence

Post by DreamingBlue »

Alice, I know, isn't it so frickin' dumb?
Post Reply