Limerence for a co-worker

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David
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by David »

Something I constantly and consistently ask clients with limerence is what would you and I be working on if you were not so distracted by your Limerence?
Purchase the 20 part video series on overcoming limerence for just $49 - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
edwin
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by edwin »

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Last edited by edwin on Sun Jul 24, 2022 5:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
David
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by David »

Once we get Limerence it’s extremely hard to get rid of. We either transfer it to somebody else, consummate the relationship or starve it by going no contact. In my experience the latter still doesn’t get rid of the symptoms for a very long time.

Tenov who was the person who first described Limerence didn’t describe a fourth resolution to Limerence and that is to work on our underlying trauma that led us towards Limerence in the first place. And working on our underlying trauma it’s not a quick fix either in spite of what snake oil sales people might tell you on the Internet.
Purchase the 20 part video series on overcoming limerence for just $49 - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
L-F
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by L-F »

David wrote: Mon Jun 20, 2022 8:34 pm And working on our underlying trauma it’s not a quick fix either in spite of what snake oil sales people might tell you on the Internet.
Where, where??? I want to buy some! :D
David wrote: Mon Jun 20, 2022 8:34 pm We either transfer it to somebody else, consummate the relationship or starve it by going no contact. In my experience the latter still doesn’t get rid of the symptoms for a very long time.
I can vouch for that. A looooong ass-time.
Limerence is an addiction to romance based on insecurity. LF
Stanfi
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by Stanfi »

L-F wrote: Mon Jun 20, 2022 11:53 pm
David wrote: Mon Jun 20, 2022 8:34 pm And working on our underlying trauma it’s not a quick fix either in spite of what snake oil sales people might tell you on the Internet.
Where, where??? I want to buy some! :D
David wrote: Mon Jun 20, 2022 8:34 pm We either transfer it to somebody else, consummate the relationship or starve it by going no contact. In my experience the latter still doesn’t get rid of the symptoms for a very long time.
I can vouch for that. A looooong ass-time.
Hold my beer. (I just couldn't resist saying that!)

I will say this. I completely agree with what David said in dealing with underlying issues. From my own experience if that is not done then the LE is a never ending cycle. Transferring from one LO to the next, and in my experience even back to a previous LO.

But hey, is someone can post a link for that snake oil, I'll give it a try!
“Don’t ask me about the years I spent out in the rain. About the one I spent in love or the ones I spent insane. I told that was a long time ago. “ - Waylon Jennings.
David
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by David »

Stanfi wrote: Tue Jun 21, 2022 3:00 am https://www.pakcosmetics.com/brand/Mama ... cid=135232

But hey, is someone can post a link for that snake oil, I'll give it a try!
https://www.pakcosmetics.com/brand/Mama ... cid=135232

dont quote me if it doesn't work!
Purchase the 20 part video series on overcoming limerence for just $49 - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
L-F
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by L-F »

=))
Try it Stanfi! Take one for the team and report back to us.
🍻
Limerence is an addiction to romance based on insecurity. LF
edwin
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by edwin »

David wrote: Mon Jun 20, 2022 8:34 pm Once we get Limerence it’s extremely hard to get rid of. We either transfer it to somebody else, consummate the relationship or starve it by going no contact. In my experience the latter still doesn’t get rid of the symptoms for a very long time.
It looks like for a single person, if you can't consummate the relationship, the best way is to start dating someone else...
edwin
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by edwin »

L-F wrote: Fri Jun 17, 2022 11:54 pm My advice would be to ignore this person completely, I wouldn't even acknowledged them in the room.
Well, a week later, she’s seeking attention, testing the waters and trying to interact with me. I ignored her all day long, but it didn’t prevent LE and couldn’t sleep last night. However, I cannot treat her this way. We are only o handful of people at work, they will notice right away, and it puts me in bad light. It looks like she want’s to put things back in the state it was before everything started.
L-F wrote: Fri Jun 17, 2022 11:54 pm A person doesn't typically say they will report someone unless they feel threatened in some way. Perhaps she was limerent too and isn't sure of what's going on.
I believe it was a desperate attempt from her part to stop me. And NO means NO, and I have to stop, but I was too blind to see this.
AMA210
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Re: Limerence for a co-worker

Post by AMA210 »

Hi Edwin,

Welcome to the forum.

If it's at all possible, please try to end the rollercoaster of push and pull/hot and cold with this co-worker. Within my own LE, I was on this ride for over six years, and it never improves and the LO doesn't change. The only aspect that holds the potential for change is ourselves.

Over a long and painful time, eventually I learned that I am worthy and deserve to be with someone who is consistent.

I would try to move the focus back to you. All the best.
Never give up! Keep moving forward, no matter what.
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