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David wrote: ↑Sat Dec 17, 2022 7:05 pm
I also question married men that have “friendships” with woman. Its asking for problems and what is it that prevents you from getting what you seek from these friends that you are not getting from male friends?
Evolution aside, I've always carried this view when it comes to heterosexual men. I just don't get their need to be friends with women they could potentially be sexually attracted to. And vice versa. I've always questioned men on here about why they can't meet these needs with male peers. I enjoy seeing the younger generation not being ashamed of bromance (homosocial bonding).
A genuine friendship that's non-sexual (and not likely to invoke desire).
"And in the end, we were all just humans…Drunk on the idea that love, only love, could heal our brokenness." ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald
It does seem part of the process. Something like eating chocolate might be a way you could wean yourself off the feelings, IDK if it's best to do that or go cold turkey. Good luck to you!
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David wrote: ↑Sat Dec 17, 2022 11:24 pm
I should have stressed this relates to heterosexual men. For gay men, I think it’s different.
Yeah, what about bisexual people? Are we supposed to just have no friends? Which is totally fine with me personally btw...
"Tell me...how many times did you have sex with him?" Griselda, Cocaine Godmother
"Six, why?" Affair partner
"Because that's how many times I'm going to shoot you," Griselda
I don’t think I have a pathological “need” for female companionship. I have both male and female friends. I don’t go looking for attractive females to befriend. In fact, I was not initially physically attracted to my LO - I found her to be very average looking. I only became physically attracted after several months of getting to know her.
I am also somewhat weary of female therapists. I agree it would be preferable to undergo counseling with someone who shares the male perspective. But frankly, there seem to be very few male therapists in my area.
I don't think it's about a pathological need as opposed to operating on firmware that is hundreds of thousands of years old according to David. In short, limerent-prone men should NOT be friends with women because they can't be trusted to keep their testosterone-driven needs in check. Sorry for being so blunt, apparently it's written into heterosexual male programming (or something along those lines).
"And in the end, we were all just humans…Drunk on the idea that love, only love, could heal our brokenness." ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald
Which is totally fine with me personally btw...