BECOME A MEMBER AND EMBRACE EXCLUSIVE ACCESS
Unlock exclusive features and connect with like-minded individuals by upgrading to our premium membership.
As a member, you'll gain access to our members-only forums, where you can:
Engage in meaningful discussions: Read, create, and search all threads and posts, fostering a vibrant community of like-minded individuals.
Establish deeper connections: Utilize our private messaging system to connect with other members on a personal level, fostering meaningful relationships.
Enjoy these benefits and more for just $2.99 per month, payable securely via PayPal.
Membership is flexible, allowing you to cancel anytime without any hassle.
Sign up today and embark on a journey of personal growth and connection. Join our community of passionate individuals and unlock a world of possibilities.

Click https://limerence.net/membership-accoun ... p-checkout

Progress reports?

A place for those new to this site. The more experienced users of this site tend to frequent the members only section more.
Zsababy
Posts: 543
Joined: Fri Jan 07, 2022 8:15 am
United States of America

Progress reports?

Post by Zsababy »

Hey all,
Anybody got any progress to report? Good or bad?

I feel like my status is pretty good, though who knows. I was fantasizing about him a lot last weekend but now I feel like it might be fading. I feel like I'm seeing him more as a real person and me as possibly coming off annoying to him by commenting to much or too much flattery on Twitter. So I think the euphoria is calming down even though I just couldn't do no contact without getting really depressed.

How about you?
JupiterTaco
Posts: 5642
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2015 6:12 pm
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by JupiterTaco »

I go back and forth but oddly feel I'm finally getting better. I'm also staying focused on changing the things that are making me want to escape from my life.
"Are you hitting on me?" Paige, The L Word
"Um...no...I wasn't...but...I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable," Shane
"I'm sorry. I was hoping that you were," Paige
L-F
Posts: 4497
Joined: Fri Sep 29, 2017 9:55 am
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by L-F »

I'm done and dusted with the fantasies. Took years to unpack and I have no clue if that means everything is unpacked or if you can fully unpack if you know what I mean. But limerent? Not anymore.
"And in the end, we were all just humans…Drunk on the idea that love, only love, could heal our brokenness." ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald
Zsababy
Posts: 543
Joined: Fri Jan 07, 2022 8:15 am
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by Zsababy »

Well that didn't last long! Tonight I was looking at nice, romantic hotels he could stay at in SF for our romantic rendezvous! Of course, I'm aware that it's fantasy but still. At least I'm cutting down on commenting on his Tweets and feel generally more grounded about the whole thing. I don't totally obsess about whether or not he "liked" my comments and I don't think I'm reading into things anymore.

I hope my relatively firm ( for me) grip on reality is permanent. I have a feeling it is. Still lots of fantasy thoigh
HenrySilver
Posts: 20
Joined: Fri Dec 16, 2022 2:30 pm
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by HenrySilver »

Happy new year, all.

It’s good to hear everyone seems to be doing well.

I’ve been minimal contact for about 2.5 months. No contact is difficult because we work together, are close friends, and have several mutual close friends. There have been a couple of “relapses” when I reached out. I tried not to beat myself up about it.

I found a therapist who is well versed in limerence. The sessions are helping.

I also find reading the “Recovery Mindset” blog post from the LwL website to be therapeutic when I’m feeling the craving to reach out to my LO.

It’s not easy but I’m trying my best. I still miss her deeply and wish I could go back to the glimmer phase. I noticed the other day that I have been going chunks of time without thinking of her. That’s new and reassuring that I’m on the right path.

Wishing you all a limerence free new year.
Male, married
LO, married coworker/close friend
Tmblwd
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Jan 07, 2023 8:24 am
Gender:
Germany

Re: Progress reports?

Post by Tmblwd »

Not sure if I can call this progress to begin with but I guess I'm getting more familiar with and used to everything related to limerence. Of course, there's still a lot for me to get to know.

I think I still fantasize as much as before, maybe even more so. But at least I'm not really beating myself up for it anymore. If that's a good or a bad thing? No idea really. For my mental health this new view on things is definitely better but if I look at everything with the perspective of recovery and being 'normal' then it's probably a bad thing.
Zsababy
Posts: 543
Joined: Fri Jan 07, 2022 8:15 am
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by Zsababy »

I did a good thing yesterday and deleted the Twitter app from my phone. I still have an account and still can access it from my old phone, but this should reduce my reflex of checking his Twitter two or three times a day. It was pretty bad. I can't access it anywhere near as easily
Zsababy
Posts: 543
Joined: Fri Jan 07, 2022 8:15 am
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by Zsababy »

Tmblwd wrote: Sat Jan 14, 2023 2:04 pm
I think I still fantasize as much as before, maybe even more so. But at least I'm not really beating myself up for it anymore. If that's a good or a bad thing? No idea really. For my mental health this new view on things is definitely better but if I look at everything with the perspective of recovery and being 'normal' then it's probably a bad thing.
I think shame is never helpful in dealing with issues. Better to work on the causes rather than think you're a bad or sick person, as long as you know what you need to work on. Especially if your behavior isn't destructive to others. Working on causes is best.

It's been about a year and a half & I'm pretty resigned to letting this run its course while not letting it take over my life. I'm much better than I was in the beginning. I think the first thing to work on is the delusion, then acceptance then keeping fantasies under control.

My relationship & productivity are better now, so I feel like it's some kind of progress. Plus I'm not tortured by the thought that he'll be with someone & not me & that I'm not good enough, etc
Keater
Posts: 58
Joined: Sun Nov 22, 2015 3:02 pm
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by Keater »

Progress.
Well I see a therapist regularly. Like maybe every 3 weeks or so. I think that helps.
I still see and talk to LO often. Send him stupid messages. Take him dinner. Volunteer for shit for the chance to see him.
I’ve actually kind of been opening up to him a little more. He’s in a position that you would kind of do that in a certain context anyway. And no he isn’t my therapist lol.
I still hang on little things he said. Like when he wrote me a card. I have it in my things. He does say very nice things to me sometimes. I’m always looking for eye contact. Sometimes I get really good ones.
A certain level of paranoia, like I almost don’t want to say too much here.
Fantasizing isn’t at a high level right now. So that is nice.
It’s been nearly 2 years. Kind of wild to think of it that way. My previous LO was 4 years or so and that was with NC even. So we will see.
Have you no idea that you're in deep?
I dreamt about you nearly every night this week
How many secrets can you keep?
'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat
Zsababy
Posts: 543
Joined: Fri Jan 07, 2022 8:15 am
United States of America

Re: Progress reports?

Post by Zsababy »

Keater wrote: Tue Jan 17, 2023 3:50 am Progress.
Well I see a therapist regularly. Like maybe every 3 weeks or so. I think that helps.
I still see and talk to LO often. Send him stupid messages. Take him dinner. Volunteer for shit for the chance to see him.
I’ve actually kind of been opening up to him a little more. He’s in a position that you would kind of do that in a certain context anyway. And no he isn’t my therapist lol.
I still hang on little things he said. Like when he wrote me a card. I have it in my things.
Any way you could cut back on your contact? I would think that would make it almost impossible for the limerance to fade. Do you think he suspects your attraction?
Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest