Recently I had a talking stage/ almost relationship with this guy who we will call L. We were talking for maybe a month or so, and met quite a few times. I fell in love easily, I got attached easily (I always have with anyone I talk to, and I suck at getting over people). He was the first guy to ever treat me like we were in a relationship yk? To show me that love and give me that treatment and don’t get me wrong he’s a very good guy, he hurt me yes and I have hate towards him for that but he seriously deserves everything good for him. He’s a very good person so please don’t think bad of him from this.
Yes I’m only young as you could put it I recently turned 16 a few months ago, so I have time to find someone else or “my person” but I’m hurt and stuck and idk what to do.
He ended things with me because he didn’t want to do it with the distance (1hr), which I mean fair enough on his behalf obviously it sucked but I was willing to work through it. He wasn’t. But the way he told me made me think maybe he had thought about it before hand and just wasn’t going to tell me unless I brought it up, like I was saying how I was trying to organise to come see him again, and he was like “I don’t know if we can do things tho, as I don’t know if I can fully commit” (things not being sexual) but I don’t want just that yk? I don’t want it to be a hookup and he knew that and he didn’t either I wanted something genuine and I felt that with him. I felt like I could be myself completely with him, he was the first guy to ever show me genuine love and to be genuinely interested in me. (I’ve struggled with my looks and self worth).
After that I was heart broken and still am tbh, fast forward a week or so he mentions he’s been snapping and talking to another girl (only for like a day or two) but why would he have to bring that up with me, if they aren’t even a talking stage or anything? When he KNOWS I still like him. But he wasn’t sure anything was going to happen with her and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to keep talking to her, I told him to continue as you can’t really tell what someone’s like with only talking to them for a day or so. I regret that. Things seem to be going well for them now and I’m happy for him, I’m happy he could move on so easily (no I’m not. It hurts, was i just that easy to move on from? Did any time we spend together just mean nothing to him?) I’m still stuck on him and it hurts. I’ve unadded him on most of my socials and I’ve hidden our photos together as I can’t delete them but I can’t bear to look at them. I am no where near close enough with my parents to talk about this with them, and I’m scared to from what happened with my older sister when she did. So I’m hoping this may help.
I still really like him and it’s killing me knowing he’s talking to another girl, but also when he mentioned her I continued to have simple conversations with him for a few days and he kept mentioning how he wishes it was me, and if only I could move closer to him and then we could be something. And out of respect for the other girl and for myself I unadded him. I would hate to be the other girl in this situation and I need to move on I just can’t.
He messaged me on the remaining social I had him on and asked why I unadded him I said how it wasn’t fair to the other girl if I still like him and is in contact with him when I like him, and how I need to move on and to do that I needed to unadd him.
He said he can still be loyal and be friends with me and that’s when it hit they are something now. I completely back tracked in my healing process and I’m stuck. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to move on and I just I’m not doing okay.
I’m very sorry for the long paragraph
but thankyou for reading it all
